Ladies and gentlemen, faithfuls and fiends alike—buckle up, because The Celebrity Traitors just dropped a BOMBSHELL double twist that’s got the entire nation gasping, clutching their pearls, and screaming at their telly screens! We’re hurtling toward the grand finale on Thursday, November 6th, and if Wednesday’s episode didn’t leave you white-knuckled and wide-eyed, well… you might just be a Traitor yourself. Claudia Winkleman, our queen of midnight menace, pulled out not one, but TWO game-shattering surprises that flipped the script faster than a Traitor dodging a banishment vote. This isn’t just TV—it’s a psychological thriller wrapped in a cocktail party from hell!
Let’s rewind the chaos, shall we? The episode kicked off with a gut-punch straight from last week’s cliffhanger: the Traitors’ brazen “face-to-face” murder at the towering chessboard. It was down to three unlucky souls—Kate Garraway, Nick Mohammed, and comedian Lucy Beaumont—standing there like lambs to the slaughter. And who got the poisoned chalice? None other than the quick-witted Lucy, stabbed in the back (quite literally) by her so-called friend Cat Burns. Ouch! As the fog rolled in and the deed was done, Lucy didn’t go quietly into the night. Turning to Cat with fire in her eyes, she unleashed: “I hope you feel terrible about yourselves. I’m not happy with you at all. You have played this really, really well.” Cat, ever the smooth operator, could only muster a sheepish “Sorry, Lucy.” Betrayal never tasted so bitter—talk about a friendship fracture that could power the National Grid!
But hold onto your armchairs, because the real fireworks exploded at the Round Table. After weeks of whispers, wild accusations, and enough side-eye to sink a battleship, the Faithfuls finally nailed their first Traitor: the silver-tongued showbiz legend Jonathan Ross! Six votes came thundering his way—Joe Marler, Celia Imrie, Kate Garraway, Nick Mohammed, and gasp—even his fellow Traitors Alan Carr and Cat Burns turned the knife! Jonathan, ever the strategist, had pointed the finger at David Olusoga, while David clapped back at Nick. The tension? Thicker than a Traitor’s lie. As Jonathan rose for his big reveal, he didn’t just unmask—he unleashed. “I’ve got no idea what everyone’s doing wrong,” he drawled, channeling his inner diva. “I cannot believe you’ve done it again. I can’t believe I’m standing here for no good reason… so I don’t want to be rude, but you’re idiots.” The room froze. Heads in hands. Jaws on the floor. Then, the mic-drop: “But I am not judging because it’s fiendish. I’m not blaming the players, I’m blaming the game. I am now and have always been… completely faithful… To the Traitors!“
Cue pandemonium! Joe Marler dubbed it “the most ridiculous bow-out ever,” while the Faithfuls erupted in cheers—they’d finally drawn first blood! But Jonathan, cool as ever in his exit confessional, spilled the tea: “They got me, but I’m kind of relieved. Glad Alan went for me too—we’ve been Traitors all the way through. Hoping, out of honor for the departed older member of the family, they’ll stick together and romp off to victory!” Oh, Jonny boy, if only you knew the storm you’d just unleashed…
Just when the Faithfuls were popping the confetti for their “win,” Claudia swept in like a raven-haired harbinger of doom with Twist No. 1: “You did it just in the nick of time,” she purred, “because after tomorrow, the banished players will not reveal their true identity.” Say what?! Jonathan’s dramatic unmasking? Turns out it was the last one we’ll see. From here on out, the fog of war thickens—banished players walk away shrouded in mystery, leaving the Faithfuls stabbing in the dark. It’s a masterstroke of paranoia, designed to make every glance, every giggle, feel like a potential death sentence. The game’s not just on; it’s eviscerated.
And if that wasn’t enough to send shivers down your spine, enter Twist No. 2—the murder method that’s straight out of a Hitchcock fever dream: Killing in Plain Sight… Again! No shadowy turret huddles for our remaining Traitors, Alan Carr and Cat Burns. Oh no. Claudia’s missives were crystal clear: “Traitors, tonight there will be no secret meeting. Instead, you must murder in plain sight at tonight’s dinner. One Traitor must toast the player you want to murder while saying the words ‘Parting is such sweet sorrow’ followed by their name. You must do this before the night is over.” Echoes of Alan’s earlier bold move—publicly toasting Paloma Faith to her doom—anyone? The pressure’s cranked to eleven!
Slipping away to the kitchen like conspirators in a Carry On film, Alan and Cat hashed it out. “I can’t see you saying it,” Alan quipped to Cat, eyebrow arched. Cat, the sly songstress, fired back with genius: “Pretend you’re quoting the recently banished Stephen Fry!” Alan, ever the trooper, deadpanned to camera: “I have to do all the dirty work for these Traitors. I’m surprised they don’t have me up in that turret with a hoover, doing some light dusting.” Classic Alan—laughs amid the lethal! But who’s next on the chopping block? Will Cat step up, or is Alan the fall guy once more? The dinner table’s about to become a verbal minefield, with every clink of glass hiding a dagger.
From the jump, the Faithfuls thought they’d cracked the code by ousting Jonathan. Wrong! Dead wrong! It was all a glittering distraction—a smokescreen for the REAL Traitor master plan brewing in the shadows. Alan and Cat aren’t just surviving; they’re thriving, turning the castle into their personal puppet show. With identities now locked away post-banishment and murders masquerading as toasts, the finale’s primed for the mother of all betrayals. Who cracks first? Who toasts their way to treachery? And can the Faithfuls—Joe, Celia, Kate, Nick, David—sniff out the snakes before the crown slips away?
Tune in Thursday for the bloodbath finale—because in The Celebrity Traitors, trust is the ultimate traitor. Who’s with me? Faithful or foul? The game’s afoot, and it’s filthier than ever!